Preston's feeding story

A little over a year ago, I bought some of those Gerber puffs at the grocery store and scattered them across the tray of Preston's highchair. At this point, he was still nursing, and we had begun introducing cereal and homemade pureed fruits and vegetables into his diet. Now it was time to work on self-feeding, a seemingly easy milestone on the path of growing up. After all, that Cheerios commercial where the mom gives her baby one, saying how it was her first food, too, made it look like something that would happen successfully in less than 30 seconds. (And I base all of my core truths on commercials.)

Well, like most things I think about parenting, I was proven wrong. Preston would pick up and play with the puff but wouldn't put them in his mouth. But this is the kid who never put anything weird in his mouth. Sure, he'd chew on toys and of course his beloved paci, but I never had to watch him to make sure he wasn't eating leaves, coins or other choking hazards. I knew this wasn't typical of his age at the time, but thought little else about it. Besides, Preston is my cautious, deliberate, thoughtful child. From a young age, he wouldn't do anything he wasn't completely comfortable with, as evidenced by the fact that he didn't walk until he was 17 months old. But when he started, he hardly ever fell or stumbled.

After letting him play with the puffs, I finally stuck one in his mouth for him to eat to show him it was food and not a scary, foreign object. He moved it around in his mouth for a bit, but the second it started to move to the back of his mouth, he panicked, gagged, and spit it all up. Tears ensued, so I cleaned him off and canceled the lesson for the day. Next time.

Well, there were a lot of "next times," but never any successes. There was a lot of cleaning up throw up, though. So, I called it quits. The kid didn't have any teeth anyway, so we'd try again when he got some. Once a few teeth popped in, we tried again, but he wouldn't have it. The gag-filled lessons had scared off my cautious boy. Scott and I would show him how we did it, putting the food in our mouths and over-acting our chewing until it was all gone. All that taught Preston was to make really loud "Om-nom-nom" sounds. I tried ways of tricking him into it: making his pureed foods chunkier (on which he gagged), crumbling up graham crackers and putting that in his purees (on which he gagged), getting him quick-desolving yogurt drops (on which he gagged) … nothing seemed to work.

So, again, I called it quits. When he showed an interest in our foods, we'd try again. But as he got closer to 18 months old and was still not eating anything he had to chew, I got worried, egged on by the fact that he's in the third percentile for weight and height. Preston's doctor didn't seem concerned. He said to just keep at it. But wiping spit up and tears off my child's face (and fighting tears of my own) night after night didn't feel like it was helping. It just left both Preston and me frustrated and frazzled.

I felt like I'd failed my child. Eating is so basic; why wasn't I able to teach him how to? I was at a loss for what to do next.

About this time, I learned that speech therapy could actually help Preston. I had always thought speech therapy was for speech only, working with kids who have lisps or can't say the letter "T," but it covers a lot more than that. Feeding and eating actually play a huge part in speech development, and the act of chewing builds muscles that help the mouth form consonants later on.

I was so relieved to learn that there was an outside source I could go to. So much of the stress I felt and that Scott felt was that this was all on us, and now we would have someone else showing us some ideas and techniques that would help and who would also be an encouragement to Preston as well as us. Making it all the better was that there is a speech clinic at the university where I work, run by communication sciences and disorders undergraduate and graduate students along with their speech-pathologist professors, that could help us.

For the past three months, every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon, Preston has been going to his feeding therapy with one of the sweetest graduate students who his helping him become more and more comfortable with food. When I ask Preston what he does with Mrs. Erin, he says, "Bubbles!" but they actually do a lot more. He's to the point now where he will ask for certain foods, actually put them in his mouth (which, on its own, is SO HUGE for him), and take bites. Sometimes he chews that bite, but he still spits out the food, never swallowing it. But he's progressing, slowly but surely, and I am so incredibly thankful for his therapist, for his progress, and for finally feeling like we've found something to help Preston along.

I say all this because there were times where I thought he'd grow out of it, times where it was a struggle, and times where I felt like I had a weird kid whom I didn't understand. There were even more times where I didn't want to say anything to anyone else for fear they would think I had a weird kid, too. I worried about him and cried about him and wanted nothing more than to be able to automatically fix what was wrong with him.

But now I don't feel so hopeless. His progress makes me so proud, and I think that this will be the year he'll want to and be able to eat a piece of cake for his birthday. He's come a long way!

How we spent our snow days

We were gifted an extra long weekend thanks to Sunday night's ice storm. I was most excited to get the phone call that campus was closed early in the evening so I could stay up late watching the Oscars (11 is very late for me) and not feel like morning Jennifer was going to hate me later.

Sure, there were things that needed to be done around the house and, with those two extra days off, we could've been very productive people. But Preston had been sick over the weekend, so he was still recovering from that. And I would much rather stay in my pajamas watching Netflix cuddling a sickly boy than any other "productive" activity. That's the true gift right there.

Preston has been stuck on his sunglasses for a little while now, and he started requesting the pairing of "gasses" and hat for around the house. Sometimes the glasses end up on his belly. March to your own drummer, little man.

Poor Scott had to venture out briefly on Monday, so Preston and I colored and worked on color recognition. I was completely surprised when he was able to name most of the colors he saw, something he'd been working on with his sitter. Anything with stickers is a hit with him, so he enjoyed it. Most of the stickers ended up on his face or my hand toward the end.

Thanks to Netflix, I was able to introduce Preston to the wonderful world of Disney and the word "movie." He was enrapt in "Lilo and Stitch," especially the musical stylings of Elvis, doing the finger guns dance he learned from Aunt Coco. (Please note the Guy Fieri-way of wearing his sunglasses he's sporting here.) I hadn't seen him sit still for that long in quite sometime. Later, Scott and I took advantage of nap time and watched some "House of Cards" (we're up to episode 6 in season 2).

While I'm incredibly ready for much warmer temperatures and much less ice, I was thankful for the days off and the time we got to spend together. Pajamas are always preferable to work attire.

Planning an Oscar party

As I've noted before, Scott is a huge Oscar buff and subsequently got me into them as well throughout the course of our relationship. Every year we print off ballots and compete to see who can correctly guess the most award recipients. We've had watch parties of varying scales in the past, and while having a bigger scale party is fun, I've come to prefer a lower key gathering with a smaller group.

Here are a few of my suggestions for hosting your own little Oscars get together (red carpet optional).

"Low key" is really just code for "I get to wear pajamas." OK, maybe not straight up pajamas, but comfort is definitely important. Let the stars wear the long gowns, tuxes and jewels; I'll stick to a cozy shirt and pants. That doesn't mean you have to feel frumpy when you see Jennifer Lawrence looking awesome, though. A chambray shirt, some a-little-fancier-than-regular sweatpants or a simple T-shirt dress will make Katniss wish she were wearing what you are and not the other way around.

Everything is better when there's an element of competition involved (and the promise of rubbing my winning in the faces of others). So a ballot is essential. For those who care more about what everyone is wearing, this rating card can turn everyone into Joan Rivers so they can decide who was a hit and who was a miss. Red carpet Bingo is another fun pre-show game — the winner can even give a heart-felt acceptance speech before being played off stage. 

In past parties, we (meaning "I") have looked for ways to incorporate the movie titles into the foods themselves. For instance, this year I'm pushing for Dallas Buyers Club sandwiches. They don't all have to fit that mold though (my brain is bending itself into a pretzel trying to incorporate "Her"). Caramelized onion and shallot dip and proscuitto-wrapped pears are simple yet seem very Martha Stewart, and chocolate-dipped potato chips are movie snacks at their finest.


So, who gets your pick for best movie? Best actor? Best sound mixing? (Can you tell I need some help with my ballot?)

Closet MVPs

I have a tendency to wear and re-wear a select number of items in my wardrobe. I've selected my three favorites that have proven themselves time and again and have earned the title of MVP.

J.Crew shawl cardigan

I've had this sweater for five or so years now, and I bust it out as soon as the temperatures drop. It's extremely cozy and yet still looks pulled together. I remember Stacy and Clinton on "What Not to Wear" preaching a "rule of three" where an outfit needs three pieces to feel complete. This is all to often my third piece, going over any and every shirt I own. It's held up well, although it is a little pilly— something I've noticed and been frustrated with other J.Crew sweaters in the past. But I love it just the same and will probably wear it until it's just a collection of fuzz balls, string, and a button.

Boden Bistro Cropped Trousers

These are a new find that quickly found a space in my heart. I have never been a big dress pants fan. They just never looked right on me, especially in the once-popular wide leg variety. I looked like Sponge Bob because, with my leg length, those things were basically square. These Boden pants, however, changed my mind. I love the skinny fit and slight crop, which gives them an Audrey Hepburn feel, and they come in a variety of prints and colors. I have a basic black, navy polka dot that helped me ease into the patterned pants world, and a hot pink pair. They also have a bud print and yellow polka dot print that are calling my name.

J.Crew glass bead ribbon necklace

This is my every necklace. The glass beads allow it to match anything and take on the color of what I'm wearing, the ribbon lets me make it as short or as long as I'd like, and the bauble gives it enough sparkle to appease my inner magpie. I have to make a conscious effort to not wear it every single day because I easily could.


What are your closet MVPs? A perfectly transitional dress? A bright pair of shoes? What do I need to add to my arsenal?

Also, I've made a pin board of my closet MVPs or similar items so you can scoop them up yourself if you're so inclined.

Here comes the sun

Pulling into the driveway yesterday, I asked Preston, "Do you want to go outside?" His face lit up immediately. After a winter of being cooped up in the house, it was time to get into the sun and get the front of your shirt soaked in bubble solution. Each day holds its own little reminder that warmer days are ahead — the sun is a little brighter each morning, the birds are beginning to chirp, and slowly we can start to slip out of our big coats. The warm afternoon declared that we wouldn't be cold forever.

Squeals of "Bah-bools!" and "Pop!" echoed across the yard, and rocks were gathered and stored away by chubby little hands. The sun did us both some good, lightening our spirits and giving us a nice dose of vitamin D. I'm looking forward to more days like that.

Celebrating Valentine's Day

For most of our relationship, Scott and I have kept Valentine's day pretty simple — exchanging cards and maybe going out to dinner or giving a small gift. To me, Valentine's Day is kind of like New Year's Eve; it gets really hyped up and if it doesn't live up to those lofty expectations, then it's a failure. Not to sound all anti-establishment, "Valentine's Day is made up by the greeting card company" about it. I do appreciate a day dedicated to celebrating the ones you love, but I try not to build it up too much. Simplicity is best.

My friend Hannah and I were talking about Valentine's Day gifts for our spouses. She and I were both lamenting that the sweet, Pinterest-y ideas out there are completely impractical for husbands because 1) you take all that time, effort, and love to put together a year of dates package or 52 things I love about you book, building up this wonderful gift in your mind only to have 2) your husband smile, say thanks, and put it in a drawer. I'm not saying that Scott wouldn't appreciate the gesture, but these kind of gifts are made by girls with their own girl feelings in mind.

I was reminded of this principle when I told Scott that I had planned on making cinnamon rolls in the shape of hearts (per Pinterest, of course) for breakfast, but I was short on time. "That's OK," he said. "All of the icing would just fall through them onto the pan, and I'd just feel like it was a waste of icing. That's a girl thing anyway. 'Oh, how cute! Let me take a picture for my blog.'"

Yeah, he busted me. And there he summed up the two views on Valentine's Day: the man's ("a waste of icing") and the woman's ("How cute!/Blog!").

So, this year I got him a card from me, a card from Preston, and a bag of chocolate-covered pretzels (his favorite). Simple. There's really nothing on Pinterest that can match how much I love that guy, anyway. It would take all of the mason jars, burlap scraps and Valentine's puns around the world to even try to come close.

How do you celebrate Valentine's Day? Small scale or all out?

Image via Real Simple

Toddler-friendly DIY valentines

For Valentine's Day this year, I thought it would be sweet for Preston to send handmade cards to family and friends. While I think all of the ways Pinterest involves painted hand and footprints are cute and a sweet way to get the little one involved, I shuttered at the thought of a squirmy, paint-covered hand smearing on everything but the paper I was aiming for.

Since he loves stickers and tearing up any piece of paper his hands land on (books, magazines, mail, etc.), I thought this craft was the perfect marriage of his two favorite activities: tearing and sticking. Plus, it was a lot cleaner.

Together, he and I made these incredibly simple tissue paper hearts. I drew some hearts onto drawing paper and roughly cut them out to make each more manageable for Preston to work with. I smeared some glue onto each heart and showed Preston how to tear the tissue paper and stick a piece to where I had just put the glue.

He enjoyed the free license to rip something up and made lots of little tissue paper pieces. But, like he does with stickers, he wanted to peel the piece back off whenever he stuck it to the heart, which made the somewhat permanence of the glue frustrating. I helped him a little just to make sure the heart got completely covered, then I cut them out and wrote a little message on the back so they were ready to mail.

It also helped that the project could be spaced out over the course of several days so that, if he was soon over the whole process, we could abandon it to come back to it later. After one particular melt down (he wanted the glue stick, then was upset when the glue stick made him sticky), I may have just finished up the last two. It's the thought that counts, right? 

In the end, not only was it great motor skills practice, but he was able to see the process of making something on his own and sharing the finished product. I'd mark that in the "win" column.